the secret life of the american, um, thirty year old

I have to tell you something.

I'm pregnant.

Yep.

15 weeks.

I couldn't bring myself to share it before now. I wanted to. I thought about it. But I couldn't.

Partly because it was a huge surprise and I'm SO not good with surprises (so, so not good). Partly because I've been violently ill (Okay, violently might be a bit strong but there has been a lot of vomit spewing at my house.) (You're welcome for the usage of the word SPEW!). Partly because I'm embarrassed to be starting this pregnancy 20 pounds heavier and FAR less in shape from where I started with Nate. Partly because I've been having trouble eating right and exercising because I'm nervous about being pregnant again and I just feel all around bad and only want things like, say, Sonic fried mozzarella sticks. Partly because I've already been having some blood pressure and heart rate issues and, well, I NEVER had to deal with that with Nate's pregnancy and it's scary (Cue: CUT THE MOZZARELLA STICKS!) and high bp would possibly prevent me from giving birth at home (which is currently the plan; but the plan is open and I've been seeing my midwife and my OB). Partly because I've been obsessively watching the Secret Life of the American Teenager (Don't do it. It's awful.) and other terrible, trashy and awful television in an effort to NOT THINK ABOUT IT.

But, seriously, none of these things are COMPLAINTS just worries and anxieties that I'm coping with. In fact, I want YOU to GET EXCITED because I'm (and Karl as well) really and truly ecstatic to be preparing for another little one. I can't WAIT for a new little personality to join our home (Please God more laid back like Karl this time, yes?). Yes, it was unexpected but we're rolling with it. I mean, some days I still wonder exactly how I accidentally got pregnant at 30 years old but I'm (mostly) over that now. (Karl has already given me the 'it only takes one time' speech several times.)

I guess, after my miscarriage in June, I just thought maybe we'd wait waaaaaaay longer or that I would be perfectly happy with Nate being an only child. My due date for the pregnancy I miscarried was January 23. I found out I was pregnant this time around January 15. Fitting, yes?

Honestly, I'm feeling like a Real Live Human again and I have some truly hilarious pregnancy stories and tidbits to share with you (#1 being how I realized I might be pregnant) but, for now, I just wanted to LET THE SECRET OUT.

14 weeks, 5 days

the impossible

Things I can do: Birth a baby standing up in my bathroom.

Things I can not do: Remove a teensy dead fish from a fish tank while my husband is out of town.

I KNOW: Why DO we have fish KARL?!?!

frolicking amongst the flowers

We hit up the Wye Mountain Daffodil Festival this morning. The festival spans 7 acres of gorgeous flowers and is sort of a staple of springtime here in Central Arkansas for parents with little ones. My friend Jaime wrote this lovely piece about family and the festival for a campaign I'm working on at work.

We got some lovely shots ourselves this morning:

The elusive family shot:


And to show you the springtime Nate progression:

Outtake:
Jesus mary and joseph, I swear I've never been so excited for Springtime!

the orange and green

You all.

It's almost St. Patrick's Day, which (as you know) is one of my favorite days.

THAT IS WHY (clearly) I am up at 10 p.m. making (oddly shaded) green cookies in an (flour covered) orange shirt for Nate's school party. LOOKIN GOOD, yes?

Tomorrow, my friends, we will roll them out and cut them into little shamrocks and, um, chase all the snakes out of - wait, what is this holiday for again? Beer drinking, right?

The Time Suck of Sick

Day that Nate's fever started: Saturday.

Day it is now: Friday.

Days Nate has gone to school this week: zero.
(Fever stopped Thursday AM but they have to be fever free for 24 hours to go to school.)

Number of trips to After Hours Clinic: 1.

Number of phone calls to pedi: 3.

Doses of alternating Tylenol and motrin: way too many.

Movies watched: way too many. I want to throw the TV out the window.

Hours spent sleeping upright in a chair with a hot and sweaty toddler: way too many.

Hours I went to work at my actual office this week: (embarrassingly) 6. My boss is amazing. Also, I am very behind.

Rooms in my house cleaned: zero (unless you count the thousands of germ-eradicating swipes of door knobs and remotes).

Grocery store trips: zero. Looks like we are eating out all weekend!!

Final diagnosis: something viral, not the flu.... Nobody knows! Fever virus!

Total time suck: one week. What did I miss?!?

is your future really that bright? IS IT!?!?

(Warning: Old lady style ranting ahead.)

So, a few weeks ago Nate told me that it was bright out and he needed sunglasses. He, my child who hates hats, gloves, most coats and any and all accessories) wanted some shades so we (I) made a bigger deal than I probably should have about it and hit the Target to find some Diego lenses to suit his needs. (Seriously, the styles of kids sunglasses without characters on them - severely lacking.)

I was thrilled to buy them and laughed every time he told me it was too bright and that he needed to wear them (and obligingly helped him find them and put them on). All was well and good UNTIL I tried to photograph him with them on and remembered how much I DESPISE sunglasses in photographs. DESPISE.

See? It just doesn't look as cute:
See? (Insert: I CAN see your pretty eyeballs rumblings here.) This has been a recurring pet peeve of mine and this will be one of my more, um, eccentric blog posts.

Exhibit A:

My baby shower (circa 2008). Aren't we all so pretty? IF ONLY I COULD SEE YOUR EYES SO I CAN REMEMBER YOUR PRETTY FACE IN 30 YEARS (when, all your faces will clearly still be pretty but maybe not exactly the same and I'll be all faulty in memory and "IS THAT SUSAN? I CAN'T BE SURE.) (Disregard the name tag that says "Susan").Exhibit B:

Blogger lunch at Ya Ya's bistro, summer 2010. (Granted, the sun was quite scorch-ey that day and Kerri (down in front) may have actually been blinded had she not had sunglasses on in this photo. )

BUT STILL.

(Related: WHAT AM I POINTING AT? Perhaps people without sunglasses?)

Photo Courtesy of I Am Bossy, our blogger guest of honor

Exhibit C (and my personal favorite):

I was newly pregs and crazy hormonal at my friend Jenny's wedding in Mexico. Jenny asked us to do a reading during the service. Karl showed up NOT in the brown shirt (that I picked out and matched the wedding color scheme) and with his sunglasses on. All I can remember (and that's terrible because I am sure the reading was beautiful and meaningful and carefully selected) throughout the whole reading is thinking.... "I wonder how rude it would be if I just not-so gently ripped them off his face RIGHT NOW" (For the record, I did not and he is forever recorded in Jenny's wedding memories eyeball-less.)
In conclusion, you should take two things away from this post:

1. I am (officially) crazy.

2. You should be wary of protecting your eyes from harmful, damaging sun rays when I'm wielding a camera.

pen-gwwwwines

Little Rock friends, IT IS TRUE.

The penguins are here.

We got a sneak peak at the Zoo last week w/ some lovely blogger friends.

Nate's all "WHERE? WHAT PENGUINS? I WANT TO RIDE THE DAMN TRAIN."

Ahhhh... there they are! And this kind brays - like donkeys. (Who knew?)
RUN!!!!
It's hard to tell from the picture but Nate was quite sure the penguins MIGHT actually come through the glass. Mostly, he enjoyed chasing around the other eight or nine kiddos (who were actually chasing the penguins).

Good day.